The power to not hear thunder.

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power to blow out candles with you arse

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the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

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The power to not be able to reach the top shelf.

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The power to fart upon command.

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The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

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The power to turn food into shit.

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The power to light things on fire with a match

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The power to be incredibly stupid only when answering exams.

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THE POWER TO MAKE SHIT

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

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The power to turn jelly into peanut butter, but only in quantities of 17 gallons.

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power to make you the last man on earth, but all the ladies are lesbian

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how bout the power to shit bricks....

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the ability to see into the past

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The power to bleed on command

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the power to make plants grow slightly faster

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The power to fly, but only when you're on a plane

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The Ability to breathe but only when your dead

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Ability to shit nuclear waste

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The power to summon a bucket of lukewarm water every 12 days.

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The Power to make up full names on the spot.

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The power to buy anything for free, as long as it is black.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!