The power to open a walnut with your mind

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The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to write a country song

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the power to make your voice sound like a two year old little girl's.

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7|-|3 p0\/\/3r 70 0|\|L'/ b3 4BL3 70 r34D 4|\|D \/\/r173 1|\| L337 $P34|

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the power to sell jars of bodily fluids for $25 each but get arressted shortly after

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The power to keep hair from growing on your head forever.

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The power to burn ashes

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The power of being mysterious. Terribly mysterious. And possibly being capable of cutting guns in half with one's mind.

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the power to masturbate just one time a day

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Super strength, but when nobody is watching, (including you)

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The power to dive through an ocean without having to breathe, but only if the ocean is made of vomit.

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Find Waldo

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The Power to turn all your friends into a one dollar bill.

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The power to die at will.

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The power to grow boobs

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Whatever dark, twisted Satanic ritualistic superpower it took to give birth to you you FUCKlNG ugly retard loser queerfag! Nero the clit collector.

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the power to get STD's

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The power to run if you have no legs

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The power to remotely _jizz in someone's sock

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The power to speak Italian fluently while dining in a Chinese restaurant.

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The power to have psi superpowers... but YOU NEED TO CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS!

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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The power to withstand camel rape.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!