The power to move the entire universe a few centimeters

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The power to speak Italian fluently while dining in a Chinese restaurant.

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The power to kiss my mom' s ass from long distances

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The power to turn any traffic light and crosswalk sign from red to green but only when your eyes are closed.

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The power to transform yourself into a perfect copy of your mother.

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The power to walk on water, but only when it is below 0 Degrees Celsius.

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The power to make toast but only when it has bread in it and it's turned on.

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The power to uncontrollably make your clothes dissapear and only in church.

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The power to summon cops to arrest you

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The power to have Chuck Norris roundhouse kick you infinity times

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the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

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The power to make poorly drawn art in less time than it takes to blink.

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The power to see into the future of the past

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The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

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The power to turn jelly into peanut butter, but only in quantities of 17 gallons.

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the power to crap big mac combos at will

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The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

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the power to murder Joey and get away with it

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the power to know when your about to get rick rolled

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LIME

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The power to be pointless!

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Retractable Teeth

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the power to fly two inches above solid ground at the speed you walk

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ability to levitate using my fart...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!