The ability to spread toe jam on toast

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The power to identify enemies by the color of their skin.

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The power to watch grass grow

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The power to deliver gifts around the world in one night but be fatter than hell, live in a frozen wasteland, and only little kids think you exist

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The power to make grass grow at double the speed.

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The Power to count backwards extra swiftly.

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The power to stub the same toe multiple times.

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The ability to ejaculate at the most innapropriate times e.g. ur granmas funeral or your dads birthday

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the power to fire your bellybutton lint out of your navel at a speed of 3 miles per hour.

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The ability to shoot blueberry muffins from my fingertips.

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The power to increase the loudness of a crying baby.

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SGNM! Super Grammar Nazi Man!

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The power to change the colour of your internal organs.

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the power to float one atom above the ground

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the ability to bend your leg.

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The power to come up with useless power while you could be doing something literally ANYTHING else

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The power to ma-FUCK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY!!!!!

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Laser pointer vision.

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The power to have sex with jessica alba Only if you have Sex with Rosie O'Donnell with a ten inch penis

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The power To Mind Control People intro having sex with you. it only works on retards...inbred retards...male inbred retards

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the power to stuff 7 jumbo marshmallows in your mouth and say chubby bunny

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Batman

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The power to change the color of the hair on your right buttocks to any color that starts with B.

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The power to have a blue, silhouetted body, and a trollface for a head.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!