The power to not exercise.

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The power to read any language, but it will always be backwards.

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The power to reed a platypus mind.

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The power to get hurt without a break.

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The power to have a super power,

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The aability to double the current amount of money you have, only if the bank gets half the money you have.

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The power to poo without wiping.

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The power to breathe slightly faster

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The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

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The power to procrastinate so much, you don't even eat, and eventually die.

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the power to be FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!

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The power to be powerless.

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The Superpower to return and never again fade, the day Moral Man stands against the whole world, the world may just be worth eliminating. Moral: Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you dooown..

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The power to sit on a couch whenever your mother tells you that you can.

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The power to see in black and white at will.

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The ability to become sexually attractive to Killer Whales

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the power to perminately bring jade goody back from the dead

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The power to know everything, but then forget every 7 seconds

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The power to turn everything you touch into cheese

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The power to tap dance awesomely, but only when wearing bunny slippers.

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The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

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the power to catch em' all

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to do something as powerful as thin air

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!