The power to have a poo at your girlfriend's house and be only 22.2% sure that it will flush

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The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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The power to sit on a pile of change and add it up.

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The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

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To be able to generate cancer at will

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The power to not go to wor unless it's a work day and to not fell pain unless you get hurt.

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The ability to stop farting so that you blow up like a balloon that eventually bursts.

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The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

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The power that when you sit down you fall through the seat

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The power to make Thursday come before Friday and after Wednesday.

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The power to see via toe nails

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The power to: tell your women make a sandwich!

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The power to convert metric to imperial

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The power to know who farted at any time.

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The power to fly 0 feet in 60 seconds

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The power to not see the troll dude in the Pointless Superpowers logo raping the words 'Pointless Superpowers'

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The power of 50% levitation your legs would drag along the ground

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The power to be half invisible

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The ability to turn into a really comfortable chair FOREVER.

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The power to smell any flower from the 15th century once a year.

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To be able to bend glass at will but if any of the glass breaks you break with it

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The power of super farts, which doesn't work unless you probably breathe, by super farts I also mean really really really stinky long farts..

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The power to be great at math but forget how to breathe.

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The power to teleport yourself into space without a spacesuit on

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!