The ability to make any amount of money appear in your wallet. The money is in the form of the Neptunarian Dollar, which has no value anywhere on Earth.

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The ability to jump

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THE POWER TO INSERT *X**A**S***S***E* TO YOUR MONITOR . Captcha; Kick your Heels

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The power to pee out of your nose and drink out of your ears

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the power to have a combination lock, and forget the code

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the power to dislike this power

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The power to stop existing.

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The power to be able to freeze anything, with the help of your trustworthy sidekick the freezer.

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The power to communicate with people that are within 20 metres of you

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01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110000 01101111 01110111 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01100100 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001

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the power to fly, but be naturally attracted to airplanes.

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The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

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The power to disguise as an old woman but only with a proper costume and 20 minutes of time in a bathroom to get the make-up done properly.

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the power to only get an erection when a family member is looking

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The power to think of a perfectly good comeback three days later.

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The involuntary power (or rather compulsion) to add "collectors edition" to everything you ever give or sell or buy. "Old bike, but in perfect condition: Collectors edition" "Hi I am selling my body "Collectors edition" "Sadly I am allergic to my German shepherd: "Collectors edition" so I have to give it away." "Hi excuse me, where do I find the "collectors edition" Milk in this store? Eh? No any kind of "collectors edition Milk is fine" Sigh... What I mean is...

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The power to know who farted at any time.

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To be able to estimate time between 5:00am and 5:07am

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The power to uncontrollably say "thats what she said" whenever it is possible, even if its really shitty

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the ability to say either "beans are magical!" or "beans are fruit!" in an angry tone, and have people believe you

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The power to autocorrect your mom.

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The ability to stare without blinking for an infinite amount of time, but only whilst watching two girls one cup.

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The ability to look at someone and know the exact number of times they have farted in the past year.

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The power to take a crap.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!