The power to shit diamonds, but only into magical underwear that turn diamonds into shit.

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The power to sense if an object is sharp.

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the power to be powerless

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the power of the Anti-petter gun, which fires bullshit over the moon.

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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the power to say no to only dates with hot girls(your a strait male)

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Th powr to typ th 5th lttr.

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The power of christ ;)

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The power to become severely depressed and suicidal whenever you feel the slight sensation of happiness.

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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The power to waste time thinking of and uploading pointless superpowers

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the power to talk to fish but not people

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The power to disappear only when you're about to have sex.

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to be only be able to walk for 0.0183874662 ever 11.204882884832 days

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The power to stop time, but only when you are waiting for something.

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The power to disguise as an old woman but only with a proper costume and 20 minutes of time in a bathroom to get the make-up done properly.

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The ability to be frequently run over by an invisible car.

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Taekwondo

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The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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Ability to suck **** like austin calhoun

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The power to breathe

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!