The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

TREE POWERS ACTIVATE

The power to time travel 60 seconds a minute

The power to see things with your eyes open

the power to absorb other superpower, but no one have superpower

power to breath fire but only through your nose

The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

The power to be an exceedingly homosexual man and be constantly surrounded by sexy women.

The power to be immortal but only in times where it does not mater, stops working after the age of 50.

The ability to shrink the size of your third toe on your right foot every leap year.

The power to identify a senior citizen by looking at their naked butt.

the ability to draw spectacular things but only with invisible ink.

the ability to type slower.

power to fart through your mouth

the power to breath without thinking about it.

the ability to walk through your clothes

the power to shoot knifes from ur pen*s hole.(ouch)

The power to turn into a koi fish... but only when there is no water around.

The power of evolving a cancer cell everytime you blink

The power to always know the exact time.

The power to fly, but only inside an airplane.

The power to make lipstick fly

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!