Ladder hands.

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The power to change the colour of your appendix

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The power to transform into yourself.

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The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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The power to become severely depressed and suicidal whenever you feel the slight sensation of happiness.

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

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The power to waste time thinking of and uploading pointless superpowers

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the power to talk to fish but not people

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The power to disappear only when you're about to have sex.

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The power to see through womens clothes, but your gay.

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The power to be half invisible

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The power to read the terms of service.

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The ability to be frequently run over by an invisible car.

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The power to stop time, but only when you are waiting for something.

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The power to disguise as an old woman but only with a proper costume and 20 minutes of time in a bathroom to get the make-up done properly.

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to be only be able to walk for 0.0183874662 ever 11.204882884832 days

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Taekwondo

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The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

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The power to fly only when in contact with the ground

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!