The power to die from darting too hard

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The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny

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The ability to have X-Ray vision that only works on glass.

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Nobody in the world has super-powers.

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power to autocorrect your mom.

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The power to run Crysis.

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the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

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The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

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The power to solve any problem with another problem e.g. Putting out a house fire with a flash flood.

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The ability to laugh one's ass off.

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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The power to read minds, but only your own.

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power to permanently shrink one eye.

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The power to get rid of only your own power

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The power to speak braille.

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The power to open any trash can lid with telekinesis if its within view.

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The power to travel back and forth in time by pressing your left elbow against your right armpit. It really works! Try it!

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The involuntary power (or rather compulsion) to add "collectors edition" to everything you ever give or sell or buy. "Old bike, but in perfect condition: Collectors edition" "Hi I am selling my body "Collectors edition" "Sadly I am allergic to my German shepherd: "Collectors edition" so I have to give it away." "Hi excuse me, where do I find the "collectors edition" Milk in this store? Eh? No any kind of "collectors edition Milk is fine" Sigh... What I mean is...

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The power to transform money into a foreign currency of lesser value.

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the power to fly, with a string atachted to you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!