The power to make anything smell like beets by touching it and saying "Sideburn!"

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The power to not have a brain!

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The power to grow giant, sharp and needly painful dildoes out of any surface just by sitting on it.

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

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The power to fart glitter at birthday parties.

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The ability to build a wall... wait a minute!

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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the power to find children extremely attractive

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The power to fly but only when your on the ground

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The power to hypnotize chickens

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The ability to fall unconscious at will.

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power to turn into an idiot once you get a scholorship.

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The power to cheat on your wife with your wife only if shes on her period

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the power to make music for deaf people

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The power to let someone control your dick

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the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

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The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

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Good News Everyone! You have the power to read this is my voice!

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The power to tap dance awesomely, but only when wearing bunny slippers.

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The power to believe Jehova's witnesses.

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The power to turn any plasma tv into ice with 3 times the mass

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The power to shapeshift into a frog, but not the power to turn back

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The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!