The power to own Greek, Italian and Irish stocks.

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The power to make awesome school lunch for the kids!

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to transfer your soul into a burrito

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The ability to see into the past at variable times between 1 and 30 seconds but be incapable of seeing the present.

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The power to have backround music in your life.

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The power to shoot blank bullet rounds out of your fingertips.

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-The ability to turn friction on and off.

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The ability to break & unbreak every bone in your body at will

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The power to make a camera appear when someone does something stupid.

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the power get massive erections but you are only aroused buy new born babies or near death old men and women.

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The power to jump 100 feet in the air and have bones made of glass.

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The power to not have any power.

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The power to burp where you fart, and fart where you burp.

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The power to jump 1/3 of an inch higher than you would normally jump.

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The power to be invisible when singing

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the power to sleep during day

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the power to ejaculate when a hot girl walks by

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Having the power to stand still

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Nothing

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Look handsome when no one is looking at you and then when they do you change back to normal

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The power of being immune to bee stings when no bees are near you

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The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!