The power to be able to get a key for a door on that does not even exist every 6 weeks

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The power to speak any language, but not understand them.

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the power of wanting to download paid games for free and always failing

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The power to turn vaseline into mercury whenever you think about throwing away a perfectly good taco

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The power to ma-FUK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSY

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the power to be a snail when ever you think a bout snails but you CANT transform back

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The power to waste your time making a pointless website so that other people could waste there time.

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the power to be famous but no one in the world knows you are

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the power to fail at life

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The power to eat 2 hotdogs in the same bun

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the power to turn into nothing.

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The power to add a minus to your bank account balance.

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the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

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the power to twerk as good as miley cyrus

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The power to tie your shoes...... while your on BOTH knees

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to get the most rated pointless superpowers post

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The power to be a virgin forever.

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power to be a GOD with your imagination

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The power to lick your own elbow

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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The power to sneeze with your eyes opened.

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The ability to grow and shrink in size, but you still have the same strength and weight and can only do it once a month

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!