- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

The power to snore inhumanly loud

The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

The power to touch the lava when falling off the couch

The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

the ability to take a fart that other people can actually see.

The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

The power to eat anything, as long as it's food

The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

Spontaneous combustion... when on the internet

The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

The power to be immune to any type of radiation, unless it has something from the periodic table.

The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

the power to make broccoli taste like asparagus

The power to issue commands to domesticated house cats. Not the power to make them obey your commands, just the power to issue the commands.

The power to communicate with applesauce.

the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

The power to travel time at 60 seconds a minute

The power to see through glass

The power to be indecisive about which seat you can take.

The power to set money on fire

The Power of shitting by your mouth

the power to itch your teeth

Pointless Super Powers