- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to have magnetic eyeballs.

The power to laugh uncontrollably in funerals

The ability to read your own mind

The power to run slightly faster than Usain bolt

The power to smell a fart before someone lets it out.

The ability of holding your breath for the rest of your life.

The ablity to slap a policeman and get away with it.

The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

The ability to eat Oreos and not have diarrhea after.

the ability to manually control your breathing

the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

The power to sing that lame "Tomorrow" song from Annie uncontrollaby on Dec. 21, 2012.

The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

the power to teleport anywhere and see anything but every time to teleport there's 75% chance you'll die

To power to predict past events with deadly accuracy.

The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

The power to never be tired, but only when rowing a boat.

the ability to shoot a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing

The power to vomit through your anus.

The power to go back in time one second at a time, but the ability takes one second to recharge.

the power to spit long distances at inconvenient times

The power to kill someone as long as they've already been killed.

the power to finish your plate of veggies when ever you like.

Pointless Super Powers