the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

thumb_up thumb_down -60

The power to smell any mans underwear without getting caught... (works only on straight men)

thumb_up thumb_down -60

the power to be Justin bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -62

The power to speed up time for only 1 Planck Instant every hour.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

The power to shoot milk through your eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I am the daddy devil of all evil hhaha like A boss

thumb_up thumb_down -66

the power to win the crying game

thumb_up thumb_down -70

The power look completely butiful but Only in complete darkness

thumb_up thumb_down -70

The ability to find a use for High School Algebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

thumb_up thumb_down -78

The power to tell when someone is using a cheese grater within 5 feet

thumb_up thumb_down -94

The power to never sleep and instead go outside and think about your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -124

Power to freeze ice.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

blindness

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to shoot pieces of cheese from your eyes..

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to have no powers

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power to ejaculate napalm

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The power to summon a rainstorm. Just a rainstorm, nothing else.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Power to freeze your self in time but everyone else can move, but you cant

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power of reading your own mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The ability to feel pain 1,000 times more acutely than an average human.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

the power to be imune to fire but only when is -40ºC

thumb_up thumb_down +1

i love to make shit brix

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!