The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The power to time-travel to the moment you die.

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Perfect recall of every episode of Teletubies

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North Korea's Nuclear missile program.

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The power to know what happens in a film seconds before watching it.

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The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

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the power to grow any one hair at any desirable lenght

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The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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the power make the left half of your body invisible.

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The power to have your veins be a 1% lighter shade of blue.

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The power to be Rosie O'Donnell.

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The ability to forget what your saying every 3 seco- what was I saying again?

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The power drown in water

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the power to read your own mind

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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The power to smell farts nearby

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The power to commit genocide, but only on things you love.

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The power to get hurt every other hour

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The power to think this exact sentence at the worst possible time.

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The power to jump faster.

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The power to see even though you can already see.

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The ability to to wrote something useless and waste all Saturday that you need to use to study for a test.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!