The ability to read a doctor's handwriting

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The power to stick your head up your ass

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The ability to be able to be a supervillian, but only when you aren't being a villian.

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The power to see what a person is wearing.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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yo mama

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The power to sing in Portuguese, but only when you're being arrested.

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the power to play a flute to summon a black leprechaun but only when your on the verge of passing out

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Having a 5 second eidetic memory

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Being able to fly in place.

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The power to fall down in a forest, and, if none is around, noone will hear you.

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Telekinetic power over styrofoam

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Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

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the ability to do absolutely nothing

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The power to eat junk food at light speed

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The power to shrink your private parts.

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The power to make a pint a gallon

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The power to read 20 pages of pointless superpowers, but only during science class

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the power to like charlie

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the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

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the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

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the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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The power to fly, but only fly north

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The ability to sh*t actual bricks.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!