The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to make jokes about death while performing dangerous surgery or defusing a bomb

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the power to always hug people

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The power to watch tv while sleeping

thumb_up thumb_down -21

the ability to self resurrect only if you are not dead

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The power to date women if they say 'Yes' when you ask if they want to date.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A book on how to solve a paradix

thumb_up thumb_down -23

to have the power to dig a hole 2 milimeters deep in a century

thumb_up thumb_down -25

The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

thumb_up thumb_down -25

The power to live forever but only in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

The power to have explosive diarrhea when people are looking at you.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

the power to summon a pen, once

thumb_up thumb_down -31

the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

thumb_up thumb_down -31

The power to make every female cop want you... IN JAIL.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

The power to own Greek, Italian and Irish stocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The power to turn trollface by yelling "TROLLFACE ACTIVATE!" You can turn human-face again by yelling "XYGNEFAGINTHYCHRSICXAIOXJIEHJFEIHFIGHEÅÆELFKEÆKFÆEFKEÆAKFÆEAFKÆAFKEÆAFKOÆEFOKEÆFKAÆEA" For a year in exact correct spelling/pronunciation.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

The power to do reverse moonwalk

thumb_up thumb_down -45

the power to fail at life

thumb_up thumb_down -47

The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

The power to grow your fingernails .0001 centimeters a day

thumb_up thumb_down -51

The ability to swim in water.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!