The ability to die on command.

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The power to think.

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the ability to taste so good it makes you wanna slap yo mama

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times.

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The power to a nokia phone.

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The power to wet yourself at will.

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the power to produce millions of dollars but be stranded on a deserted island!

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the ability to only eat chocolate in months that do not have an "r" in them.

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The power to remember and talk about random Pokémon facts during a life and death situation.

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The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

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the ability to do absolutely nothing

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the power to talk backwards

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The power to change the channel without a remote, but only but only if you're holding the remote.

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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The power to run light speed only when the world is speed up to light speed

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The power to have to answer to morons while I put morals under EVERY one of my comments... Moral: At this point asking you makes you a trucking moron. Moral: Just to annoy you. Moral: And everyone is pointless so if you get annoyed, well that is your pointless superpower... hahaha!

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to have the power to dig a hole 2 milimeters deep in a century

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Invincibility, but you feel twice as much pain to everything

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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The power to make a pint a gallon

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!