The power to clap 14 times a second

thumb_up thumb_down +120

The power to shit brix, No wait.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

The power to see white objects in off white.

thumb_up thumb_down +112

The power to see 147 billion years into the future.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

Eclairvoiance: The ability to forsee when you will eat your next cream-filled, chocolate coated pastry...

thumb_up thumb_down +106

The power to watch a movie without falling asleep through most of it

thumb_up thumb_down +104

to walk 5 miles at 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 miles per hour

thumb_up thumb_down +104

The power to uncontrally boop

thumb_up thumb_down +100

the power of having super fast growing body hair. It grows a half inch a day.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

the power to fart your way to the moon

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to read an animal's mind, but only when they're in a vegetative state.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The power to shoot your teeth at the force of a Nerf gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

the power to jerk off

thumb_up thumb_down +46

the power to know if a movie will suck after you bought the ticket

thumb_up thumb_down +44

The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The ability to watch movies in 1D

thumb_up thumb_down +145

The power to take a s*** on people

thumb_up thumb_down +135

The power to shoot pieces of cheese from your eyes..

thumb_up thumb_down +133

the power to tell have a alarm clock in your head that only go's off evry 30 secents and it deeps for 20 u cant take it owt or stop it lols

thumb_up thumb_down +131

the ability to kill yourself... twice

thumb_up thumb_down +129

The ability to dodge bullets, but only after you've been hit by the first bullet.

thumb_up thumb_down +129

The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!