The power to create garbage out of nowhere.

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The power to inhale carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen

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The powers to have super speed when you can't run anymore.

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The power to remember when pepperidge farm remembered

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The power to slam revolving doors.

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The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

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the power to know you forgot somthing but not know what you forget

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the power to control your own body movements

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The power to buy free things.

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The power to get you`re dick stuck to a huge, heavy metal bar no one can lift nor move, either you stay there till you die, or you grab a knife and...

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THE POWER TO KNOW WHEN YOUR CAPS LOCK IS ON

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the power to kill plants in a desert.

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the power to dissaper into nothingness and appear in 2 years again while not noticing you skipped time...

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The power to read any captcha, but no longer be able to type.

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The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

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the power to understand what kate bush is singing

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The power to make food from anything, but noone can eat it.

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The Power to die at will

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the power to turn wine into water

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The power to see what's behind you.

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The AWESOME Power To See With Your Eyes Open

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The power to see when your eyes are not closed.

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The power to drink dihydrogen monoxide without dying.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!