The power of shrinking your own anus to subatomic size.

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The power to tolerate the excistance of Richard Davison

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The power to read minds, but only those of dead people.

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The power to wake up to surprise sex in the morning... in prision.

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The power to say something positive about Justin Beiber

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The power to have an indestructible tongue.

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The ability to make someone's heart stop, but only after they have died on their own of natural causes

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the power to make things out of thin air that dont work.

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The ability to recognize any meme at will.

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The power to give yourself Kidney stones.

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The power to hover 1 foot off of the ground.

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the power to self destruct without hurting people.

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The power to cause any car accident, but only when someone you love would be in it

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The ability to get out of bed in a Monday morning even though you don't want to

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The power to fight your way out of a wet paper bag.

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The power to have a power thats a power

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The power to smell bacon and/or ham at 3 o clock in the afternoon on the second Saturday of March

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The power to deep throat a giraffe!

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the power to inhale and exhale air

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The power to shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane.

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The power to dance really well

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The ability to teleport out of danger randomly, whenever you do you are handcuff at the hands and ancles naked. You also don't get to choose where you end up.

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The power of making your eyeballs bigger but without any significant improvement in your sight.

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The ability to predict the future .000001 seconds in advance.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!