The power to kill yourself

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The power to predict the present

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the power to smell shit from miles away

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The power to become CHUCK NORRIS! (if you are a teen) Which by activation you realize he is just a mediocre actor... and worst... over 70 years of age...

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the power to find a needle in a haystack

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the power to speak only in binary

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

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The power to be a walrus

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The ability to become shit forever.

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The power to revert to a six year old and teleport to the closest pedophile guild

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The ability to fly a millimeter off the ground.

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The power to die spontaneously, and have no one notice

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The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

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The power to wear comfortably wear shoes that are way too small.

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To be flaming gay. Both kinds.

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The power to breathe through your mouth when you have a stuffy nose

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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the power to destroy the planet you are standing on

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to power to do the bird is the word

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No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The power to levitate 0.000000000000001mm off the ground when going up stairs.

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Being able to have diarrhea when every you want.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!