the ability to be governor and have an Argentinian mistress

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Genetic immunity to the bubonic plague.

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The power to fall up.

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To be flaming gay. Both kinds.

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The power to always throw a napkin in a trash can from a couple feet away

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The ability to be an anoying little twat like jack moore

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The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

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The power to get up early for school, only on the weekends

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The power to switch genders but you can't switch back.

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The ability to be Edward Cullen

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The ability to sh*t actual bricks.

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the ability to tell what some last ate smelling their farts

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The power to transform into a baby only when around pedophiles.

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The have weak x-ray vision, while only seeing lead.

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The power to find a paper clip when you need one.

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The power to summon Wolverine, but only so he can give you a colonoscopy.

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The power to be stupid

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The power of flight but only during thunderstorms

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The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

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The ability to just 1 meter high, but whenever you do so you lose a meter from your height, only to regain it when you hit the ground.

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The power to see into the present

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The power to have to eat every 1 second.

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The power to give your grandma amazing orgasms.

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The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!