The power to talk in Wingdings.

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The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

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to walk 5 miles at 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 miles per hour

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The power to die at will, and you can only do it once.

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The power to turn into a potato banana hybrid.

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The power to finger some one in the arse so they shit them self.

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The power to see 3-D movies in 2-D.

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

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The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

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The power for chris not to eat spaghetti

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to drink alot of alcohol and not get drunk

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The ability to be able to be a supervillian, but only when you aren't being a villian.

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The power to put up with your in-laws.

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The power to die at will

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the power to teleport to the center of the earth

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The power to change the color of your saliva.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power of shrinking your own anus to subatomic size.

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The ability to turn into a moth only when you run into a spider web.

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The power to change any of your friend's name to Tom but only if their real name is Thomas.

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The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

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The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

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The ability to read braile.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!