The power to be -100% faster...

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The ability to swim in water.

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The power to have excellent wifi when all your devices are dead.

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The Power to make PotNoodle...

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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?u?op ?p?sdn ????? o? ???od ???

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The power to poop without wiping

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The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

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The ability to keep a song stuck in your head overnight

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The ability to produce a nickle each time you smack you`re face on any hard surface so hard you break at least 6 bones.

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pedo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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The power to be justin beiber

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The power to die on command.

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The power to do 1d3 points of damage on successful touch attack twice a day assuming no spell resistance.

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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The power to make lie the ultimate truth

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the power uncontrollably explode expensive cars

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The power of being immune to bee stings when no bees are near you

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the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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The power to do EVERYTHING backwards

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The ablility to think of the worst racial slurs, but only when a member of that race is nearby.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!