ability to swim superhuman fast, but only if you're completely naked and dry

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the power to beathe

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The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

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The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

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The power to murder rocks.

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The ability 2 breath underwater, but not above water

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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The power to become square shaped each time you are on fire. Moral: Try rolling on the ground now bitch...

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The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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the power to shoot what your looking at but only when your looking at watermelons

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The power to have the biggest boner ever in the middle of a presentation.

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The power to have a power

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the power to turn gold into cottage cheese

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The power to re-click a webpage over and over as long as it won't load

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The power to be Omnipotent and create a rock too heavy for yourself to lift.

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The power to fail a test everytime

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The power to repel water when you're thirsty.

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The power of shrinking your own anus to subatomic size.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to die at will

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The power to put up with your in-laws.

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The power to blame Indonesian children for your misfortunes.

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The power to play FPS games in real life (respawning included) but lag a lot

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!