The power to make Justin Bieber be dead but only when you are listening to someone good at singing

The power to destroy any electronic device seconds after touching itoesajfaokpnhgåpesajfjåaeafjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

the power to summon a pen, once

The power to mentally unlock any lock you can see, but only if the key is within 10 feet of where you are.

The power to have an internal monologue voiced by Morgan Freeman.

To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

The power to eat ass.

Can fall without taking any injury, but for only 1 foot.

The power to be writing a pointless superpower on a website about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive.

the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

the power to view the same insurance commercials over and over for years and recite them from memory

The power to read and immediately understand any vanity license plate from Arizona.

The power to read your own thoughts.

The power to die but once

The power to turn everything one touches with one's hand into skittles, but only applying to amputees.

the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

power to permanently shrink one eye.

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny

The power to destroy the earth the next time you blink.

The power to bleed

The power to be a woman

The pewer to become a human bullet magnet. Moral: "DONT WORRY PEOPLE! I SHALL SAVE YOU ALL!" (Well if you want to sacrifice yourself to save them all, then you its useful and you a douchebag)

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!