The ability to not be Batman

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the power to quickly re-wrap christmas presents

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the power to blind and nausiat yourself for 12 hours straight with no way to stop it ohh and the power the eat hairy dicks

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the power to move something right next to you

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the abilty to come back to life, but in a black hole.

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The power to teleport your self 5 feet ahead of you every 3 seconds

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to believe in yourself, when you can believe in me. Moral: BECAUSE I BELIEVE IN YOU!

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the power for you skin to be invisible...........but not your, muscles, or bones, or blood, or brain, or hair, or nails.....

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The power to fly to your In-Law's house and ONLY your In-Law's house.

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The power to to do the boogy dance when ants go up your pants.

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the power to go back in time, but only back 1 second.

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The ability to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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the power to go on this website

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The power to summon a Genie lamp, that if rubbed allows you to wish for 3 pointless superpowers.

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The Ability to remove your penis and grow a new one. the old penis will grow roots and become a penis tree. A lovely addition to any home.

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The power of reading your own mind.

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The power to hear other people's thoughts when they aren't thinking.

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The power to die at will

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The power to have approximate knowledge of everything.

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The ability to turn to water and back again, i.e. turning into water inside a cup, you enemy drinks it, your turn human when you are inside him, resulting in him being ripped apart from the out side

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The power to turn all people into giant robots which you don't control

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The power to NOT think up a pointless superpower.

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The power to make any drug appear in your bloodstream at lethal levels.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!