The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

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The power to read your own thoughts.

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The power to win the lottery, but only the december 21 of 2012.

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The superpower to speak and write a language that only you know.

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The ability to control water but only when it is raining

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

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The ability to troll a website like this. Basically, you do this. QWERTYUIOPASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM.

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Oye sun teri ma ka saki na ka

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The power to fly but only in closed spaces

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The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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the power to eat when you have already ate from a few hours ago

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the power to erase pencil liines using your index finger

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The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

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The pewer to kill elderly people by sneaking up behind them and yelling: MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAAT!

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The power to become real life Captain Arabian. Example: Hey nice suit, does the A on your forehead stand for America? ALALALALALALALAH! *BOOOOOOM* Moral: Next time you see someone that looks like Captain America, you better run.

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The ability to turn 100$ bills into toilet paper.

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The power to have to eat every 1 second.

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The power to remove all dirt from your skin when submerged in a tub of warm water.

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The power to levitate a lamp 4 inches off the ground... Once...

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The power to walk twice as fast as a guy who walks half the speed you normally have.

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The power to abstain from sex until you're married. At age 83.

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The power to get foot-boners

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The power to become extremely strong and intelligent by being in contact with substances such as: -Kryptonite -Adamantium -Any acid that can melt trough glass -A gallon of moose sperm ( you must be submerged)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!