The ability to beat your grandmother in a race

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The power to fly for as long as the average human is in the air during a vertical jump.

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The power to kick ass when your names aoife.

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The ability to be jokingly racist and not get sued by an hypocritically racist black man and end up having to carry out a minor jail sentence or pay a fine.

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The power to see in the dark. But only if you shut your eyes.

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The power to go back to Anti-jokes.

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The power to see the dress as both black and blue and white and gold!

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The power to call any phone number in the world, but only when using a phone owned by someone you don't know.

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The power to phase through toilet paper.

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the power of having 4 stomachs and being able to digest grass

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The ability to go on cheeseburger.com whenever you want, but only when the teacher is in the room

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The ability to survive without an apendix.

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to change what time it is 1 time per week

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the power to hear whats going on in your ear

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The power to turn cake into poop.

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The power to change to justin biber

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power to see through glass doors

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the power to sneeze cum

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The power to feel lustful when watching My Little Pony Clopfic.

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The power to look like another person, but only if the other person is uglier

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The power to produce 5 times the normal amount of ball sweat.

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The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

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The power to make a child in Africa die of starvation every time you sneeze

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The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!