The power to run as fast as a cheetah! Moral: A dead cheetah...

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the power to poop out cactuses when no toilets are in a hour drive length away

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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the power to stand awkwerdly in one place for a long time

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the ability to draw spectacular things but only with invisible ink.

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The ability to pause time. However, this pauses everything. Even you. You are screwed.

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The power to think of pointess facts at any given moment

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the power to die tomorrow morning.

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The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

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the power to pee on command

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The ability to reach the end of the rainbow!

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The power to block every twenty third bullet, shot at point blank range.

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The ability to make your text green on google

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The power to move 1 vein slightly to the left, but only if you moved to an apartment on the 29th of February (in any leap year).

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The power to lose body parts spontaneously.

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The power to make other people hold their breath.

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The power to get all the superpowers but only in your sleep/dreams.

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The characteristic that every competition in which you prefer one competitor over the other ends in a tie. So you never lose, but you never win either.

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The power to remove any fart smell from a room by taking ten deep and loud inhales through your nose (only five for girl farts).

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the power to read and agree to the terms or service

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The power to fall off a tree, then land in spikes.

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The ability to survive bleeding for a week but it forces you to turn into a total bitch .

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The power to be always able to blame others when you fart.

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The power to run at blazing speed but loose intelligence as you excelerate.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!