The power to trick yourself into thinking you have the power to trick yourself into thinking you have the power to trick yourself into thinking you have the power to…

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The power to have super-sonic hearing, but only in the presence of the mute.

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The power to type on a key board. WAIT A MINUTE

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the power to be as dumb as george bush and as useless as barrak obama

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When walking down the street, i try to get to a crack in the pavement a few feet ahead of me, and step on it before the next car passes me on the road

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The power to change the shape of any object at will

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The power to have your finger and toenail grow twice as fast as normal.

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The power to piss your pants when ever a vowel is pronounced.

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the power to remove the white seeds from a watermelon over the course of two months.

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The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

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the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

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The power to put water up my butt and squeeze and shitty water squirts out.

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the pwoer ot raed tihs wtirnig eilasy.

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the power to give extreme diarrhea to only your grandmother and your house pet

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The power to be able to able to be really smart at things no one cares about.

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The power to fly, but only when you're on a plane

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The ability to read any language and understand it perfectly but only in pitch black darkness.

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The power to bleed when your grandmother kisses you.

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The ability to turn everything to gold; as long as the original material is gold.

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The ability to become the most influential person within the borders of Idaho

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The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

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You can fly, but only while on a plane that's in the air.

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the power to make food shrimp.

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The ability to enter a coma but not be able to control for how long

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!