the power to commit suicide when you are about to die

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the power to know what time is not

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The power to block every twenty third bullet, shot at point blank range.

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the ability to smile a tooth grin while pooping on your own chest

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To control electronical devices, only while holding it's remote.

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The power to fly only when in a car.

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The power to wear your shirt backwards all day.

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The power to order stuff online with your dad's credit card

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The power to not hear thunder.

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The power to pee quietly in public toilets.

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Immunity to medication

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The power to be able to hold your farts while you pee.

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The power to make Justin Beiber come out of the closet.

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The power to summon single earthworm at will.

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power to make your saliva taste like a 90 yr old diabetic old man who has tapeworms' poop

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The power of superstrength, but heavy objects are your weakness.

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the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

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the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

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The power to shut the fuck up.

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The power to zoom in with your eyes, but only when looking to the sun.

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The power to turn food into shit.

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THE POWER TO MAKE SHIT

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The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

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the power to know when your about to get rick rolled

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!