The power to love but never be loved (a.k.a the story of my life)

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The power fuse yourself with a two lifeless jellyfish use their vital systems

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the power to dodge cars only when they are parked

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the power to projectile vomit every time you attempt to laugh.

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The power to post the same shit twice.

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The power to walk into sliding glass doors. not through them. just into them.

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The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

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the power to buy a size 11 shoe but needing a 15

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The ability to wear a backpack on your legs

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The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

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the ablity to have giant erections but only at story time

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The power to know the perfect rebuttal, but only after you've lost and nobody cares about what you were arguing about anymore.

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vomitspit

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The power to eat just one lays potato chip

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the ability to fold towels only while they are dirty.

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The power of Superuselessnessman

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The abliity to fall asleep while

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The ability to spawn any object at will,but only when your saying that you have too much of that object and actually believe yourself when you say it.

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The power to walk through walls but fall through floors

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The power to be quite good at checkers.

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The power to shoot water out of your hands--but only when taking a shower.

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the power to fly, only when in the cabin of an airplane

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The ability to immediately gain stage four stomach cancer.

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The power to speak to unicorns, even though they don't exist

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!