The power to destroy the whole universe by any sudden movement. (Our existence rests on you`re shoulders man, don't even breathe nor blink)

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The power to run on water when there is no water

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The power to troll yourself

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The power to make large black men believe you are homosexual. . . when you are a straight male.

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The power to STFU!

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the power to summon chuck norris... but he kicks your ass every time for bothering him

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The power live 0.0000001 seconds longer.

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The power to not have superpowers

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The ability to instantle tangle your hair.

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The power to make something useless after its already useless.

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The power to taste the food you deficate

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The ability to be invicible, only when you commit a suicide.

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The ability to blow strawberries

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The power to turn anything you want green.

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The ability to make the skin above your eyebrows really, really dry and flaky---whenever you want!

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the power to shit shards of glass

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The power to shape-shift but only into an Alpaca

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the power of cosmic pimping with a space suit on!

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The ability to make iguanas in Peru blink uncontrolably

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THE POWER TO FUCK ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SUCK

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The power to turn wine into water

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The ability to hold your breath forever, but only in an oxygen-rich environment.

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The power to blow out your ears by watching TV

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The power to stop a sneeze before it happens.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!