The power to not go to wor unless it's a work day and to not fell pain unless you get hurt.

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The power to accidently find all spoilers online before you watch a film or an episode of a series.

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The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

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The power to Rage Against The Machine

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to... We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Be able to hear all the alarmclocks in the world

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To Read All The Pointless Superpowers And Imagine To Have them When Other people Are Thinking That Your A Crazy-Childish Person Role-Playing those Pointless Superpowers

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The Power to Die if you are dead

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The power to make YouTube subscribers disappear.

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The power to hide your identity from anyone... who doesn't know who you are.

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The power to enlarge your penis to any size, but only you can see it.

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the power to listen to dead people that speak a different language than you.

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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the power to catch em' all

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power to eat 500000 big macs in a day

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The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

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The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pørnstar after dying.

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The ability to stop farting so that you blow up like a balloon that eventually bursts.

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the power to be like charlie sheen and relize that my score is 0

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The ability to open your window, and shout retarded things at your neighbors. "HEY! MY ASH SMELLS LIKE BANANAS!"

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The power to make you`re erections so big you faint.

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the power to see through windows.;.

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The power to teleport......one nanometer every million years

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!