The ability to fly a millimeter of the actual natural ground (cancelling stuff like concrete and water) or perfectly levitating; Criss Angel style

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the ability to make a really long post ajsfffffhkshgdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddfgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggjssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssa

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The power to walk on frozen water.

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The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

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The power to be invincible everywhere but your face

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The ability to make cardboard taste slightly less like cardboard.

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The power to break bones at will.

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The ability to talk to bacteria

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The power to flush toilets with your mind

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To be able to go to the future but only at 1 second per second.

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The power get everyone's attention by jerking off in public

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the power of having super fast growing body hair. It grows a half inch a day.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The power to turn into a lamp once.

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The power to see in black and white at will.

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The power to wish you had a power

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The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.

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The power to make anything smell like beets by touching it and saying "Sideburn!"

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The Superpower to return and never again fade, the day Moral Man stands against the whole world, the world may just be worth eliminating. Moral: Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you dooown..

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The power to get any car you want but once it runs out of gas you have to get a new one and can not be the same model.

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The ability to be blind, deaf, and mute at will.

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The power to become attractive to women. but only when your with elderly people and Sarah Palin.

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The power to teleport, but only to life threatening situations.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!