The power to make muffins appear out of nowhere.

the power to solve any problem and answer any question or equation, you just have to read all books known to mankind.

The power to lower your own ego.

the ability to cough musli in hot girls faces

The power to die at will.

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

The power to sing like Justin Beiber.

The power to autocorrect your mom.

The ability to simultaneously implode and explode.

the power to fire my lazer

The power to random things that you touch into the same thing but a different color

The ability to laugh one's ass off.

The power to menstruate from your eyes.

The power to keep up with the kardashians

The Power To Lick My Own Penis

The ability to seduce any woman.....over 200lbs......that was born with a penis.

The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

The power to turn into the Hulk, but only when you are asleep.

The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

power to permanently shrink one eye.

The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

The power to die and not come back to life.

The power to speak braille.

The power to speak to toasters

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!