- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to hurl apples at force but only when you have drunk 20 litres of water in one go

The power to compare anything to pr0n because "you know it when you see it."

The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

The power to reed a platypus mind.

the power to run 10000 mph, but evertime you ran you were teleported to a police station and you turned into a black guy

The power to type any password only if some one tells you the password first.

The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

The power of learning

The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

The power to read the terms of service.

The power to notice when things are photoshopped.

The power to talk in Wingdings.

The power to drink alcohol without getting drunk.

The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

The power to transform any food into shit simply by eating it.

the power to eat with your butt

the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

The power to grow a mustache anywhere but on your face

The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

The ability to die, when you say: "death powers activate!" . You can only do it once though.

to be able to see through doors... only when there open

Pointless Super Powers