The power to shit without squinting.

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The power to (place useless super power here)

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The power to switch any physical traits with your own reflection in the mirror.

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The power to cum out of your finger tips

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The power to quote memes randomly

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The power to fart rainbows

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The power to make hot women have sex, but only with guys that you don't know.

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The power to smell whore

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The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

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the ability to die but to reappear as a strange families pet turkey

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The power to permanently shorten your own penis

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

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The power to flush toilets with your mind

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The power of night-blindness.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to f-ck every girl in the world, read it carefully EVERY girl in the world...

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the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

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The power to teleport, but only to life threatening situations.

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The SuperPower To Have No SuperPowers

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The power to be an amazing playing instruments, but die if you touch any instruments.

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The power to fly but only in your room

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The power to waste time talking about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive

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The power to understand irony.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!