The Power to touch MC Hammer

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The power to turn your current clothes inivisible

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power to fly when your underwater

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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The power to smile uncontrollably.

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The power to do anything you want, but only when you are sleeping

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The power to journey into the future of the past.

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The power to think your dreams are real.

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The power to read minds, but only that of someone who is watching Twilight.

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The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

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the power to have an organsim when your a boy

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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The power to be able to stop the world for two seconds only every 2 years.

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the power to spawn goosebumps when ever you want

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Brazilian waxing via telepathy.

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The power to sing with your buttcheeks

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The power to glitter in the sunlight. Especially if you're a guy.

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The power to see correctly with wearing glasses

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The power to identify a senior citizen by looking at their naked butt.

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The ability to mess up a Rubix Cube with your mind

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The ability to grow and shrink in size, but you still have the same strength and weight and can only do it once a month

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!