- Pointless Super Powers

the ability to talk to humans

The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

The power to look into the car next to me at the exact moment the driver is picking his nose

The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

The power to put up with your in-laws.

The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

The ability to count to potato

The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

The power to Google "Google".

to be shitty

The ability to kill anyone, only if he/she is your close friend.

the power to walk up the stairs without losing your breath...

The power to get foot-boners

The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

the power to make glass clear

the power to change people socks on command

The power to eat a cheeseburger and still get fat from it

The power to control all bleach within one-hundred feet.

the power to jump, but only on any surface

the power to be able to speel ronj

To teleport to space and then emediately suffocate.

The power to see when your eyes are not closed.

The power to sing beautifully but only when around def people.

The power to fly, but only on the moon

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!