the power to defecate while standing up...

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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The power to phase through walls whenever there is a door nearby leading to the next room

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The power to do anything you want, but only when you are sleeping

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The power to make somebody fall in love with anybody who isn't you.

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The power to make people feel confident in themselves.

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The power to be invisible when your eyes are closed.

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The ability to put on a glove that is slightly too large and have your fingers grow to fit the glove.

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the power to stop writing pointless super powers

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The power to be able to turn invisible in the dark.

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The power to turn invisible except for your fingers and toes.

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

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The superpower to realize that if you guys thumb my former comment up, then it is no longer a useless "superpower" and would by itself contradict uh... itself.. by being useful... Moral: Hey, turning into Beiber at will is useful for banging silly young chicks at will is it not? And I will rather bang brainless women (beliebers yes I mean you, because everyone deserves some love) Disclaimer: Sexual age of consent is 16 over here, and good luck calling a whole nation for pedophiles, nope girls simply mature faster here... Fact: Above.

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The ability to become a paraplegic at will.

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The power to get an erection in the most akward of situations.

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The power to have any power when they are completely pointless to have.

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the power to die tomorrow morning.

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The power to swallow thousand liters of sperm without any ill effects.

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The power to forget how to swim.

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The amazing ability to hack peoples profiles only when they're logged in.

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spontaneous ejaculation

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to jizz in your pants when you eat a grape.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!