The power to read captchas 2% faster than usual.

The power to be superman on a planet without a sun

the power to defecate while standing up...

The ability to see into the present.

the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

The power to expel a single spaghetti from any limb randomly

The power to get laid by your right hand.

The power to turn random things that you touch into water, like in a schick hydro commercial

The power to create another human

The power to create skype chats with 50 people and subsequently annoy all of them with 200+ messages per second. unfortunately neither you nor anybody can block, silence or leave the chat

The power to see the future when you sleep but forget it as soon as you wake up

The power to kill anyone just by threatening them with slavery and death and leaving foot and fingerprints all around their place. Moral: THREATEN MY PEOPLE WITH SLAVERY AND DEATH! THIS IS SPARTA!

The power to not get shit d*ck

the power to make hate films against Islam... theres no space for bigots and jerks on this Earth.

The power to waste time thinking of and uploading pointless superpowers

The power to understand the farmer in Hot Fuzz.

The ability to not come back to life when you die.

the power to say everything in Comic Sans font.

Be able to create fire with your hands but you are not invisible to it

The power to turn 12% invisible.

The powers to blink at the speed of light

the ability to kill yourself... twice

The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

the ability to levitate

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!