The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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Invincibility, but you feel twice as much pain to everything

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The power to shrink your private parts.

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the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

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the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

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The power to know where the beef is

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The power to do anything you want, but only when you are sleeping

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The power to make muffins appear out of nowhere.

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the power to pee for longer then a normal person

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The power of tasting irresistibly delishush whenever anyone gets hungry.

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the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

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The ability to swim in water.

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The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

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The power to lick anything except pussy.

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The power of compulsive lying.

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The power to have night vision when there's daylight.

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The abilitie to tell whether or not the light on a fridge is on or off...

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the ability to make toast while standing on your head at 12:46 every Tuesday Greenwich Meridian Time.

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The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

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The ability to teleport 1 step forward at will at a walking pace.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!