- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

The power to know exactly how events would have turned out, had the last event gone differently

The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

The power to teleport to Northern Siberia with only a speedo on.

the power to fart the alphebet

the power to fart at the worst moments

The power to inhale beverages through your genitals.

The ability to sense every time your mom and dad are doing it even when you don't want to.

The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

The power to sleep while you're awake.

The power to build Lego with incredible speed, but then knock it down immediately.

the power to turn retarted

to zap people but only yourself

The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

The power to absolutely nothing

The power to wipe your ass with one confetti

the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

the power to play a flute to summon a black leprechaun but only when your on the verge of passing out

Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

Where to start? Ah yes...THE POWER TO NOT FREAKING DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pointless Super Powers