The power to attract any women you like by ripping of your junk.

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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The ability to keep a song stuck in your head overnight

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I am derpin the erp to derp the derp the erp o o o o yeah derp frika frika frika derp derp derp

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The power to turn random things that you touch into water, like in a schick hydro commercial

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The power of turning into a crushed can right after you got into a car accident.

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To Shoot Piss Out Of Your Mouth Only If You Are Taking A Dump

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to jump face first

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The ability to do moderately well on an exam while sharting next to your crush.

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the power to fail at life

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The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

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The power to gain 10 pounds whenever you eat something

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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The power to smell farts from miles away

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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The ability to look at yourself in anything, except a mirror.

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The power to lose your hearing and eyesight/

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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The power to make up pointless superpowers

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The power that turns farts into music.

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The power to revive people with terminal disease, and still they have it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!