The power to disintegrate yourself

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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The power to see through glass

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The power to fart to inside. By mouth.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to attract any women you like by ripping of your junk.

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The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

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The power throw up hockey pucks every few minutes.

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the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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boo

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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the ability to be 2Pac the day he got shot

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

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The left part of your body is fireproof but the right side is not

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The power that turns farts into music.

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The power to commit geniocide but only of you own race

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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Having the power of a normal human

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!