The ability to cut your stool in to tiny pieces smaller than a pea

Tha ability to not be able to fly

The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

The power to attract cats but be allergic to them

The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

The power to time-travel to the moment you die.

The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

the powers to be a fat gassy woman

The power of having all of Batman`s Superpowers.

the power to freeze people only when it's cold

The power to freeze time, but not unfreeze it.

The power to enter a car, but only if the car is out of gas.

The power to push "pull" doors

The power throw up hockey pucks every few minutes.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

the power to breathe in space but have to be were there is gravity

the ability to be 2Pac the day he got shot

The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!